Things that I hate

Here is a short list of some things that I hate:

1. Dental work.

2. Uncomfortable shoes.

3. Parents who don't make their kids behave.

4. Bad drivers in rush-hour traffic.

5. Snacks that warn of "anal leakage."

6. Icicles driven slowly into my eyeball with the heel of a shoe.

7. My earlobes being stretched over my head and tied together.

8. Warm beer.

9. Liars.

10. Going to the pharmacy.

Tonight, let's take a look at number 10.

Monica had a prescription that needed filled, for the eczema on the back of her thigh.  This week has been nutty, so it's not been filled.  Tonight, I was given the job of picking it up.

I stopped at Crappy Version of Stupidity, and handed over the script.  The bored, gum-chewing dim wit told me that it would be 15-20 minutes.  I wandered the store, making my own fun.  I like to stand in the condom isle, examining boxes carefully and reading every word.  People avoid you like the plague if you do this.  Trust me.

When they called my name (along with 3 other names) I stepped toward the counter.  The lady in front of me had a few items to ring up with her script, one of which was a gallon of milk.  Here is the conversation that I witnessed:

Pharmacy lady: "Would you like your milk in a sack?"
Sick lady: "No, thank you."
Pharmacy lady: "Are you sure?"
Rachel's thoughts: "SHUT UP LADY!  SHE SAID SHE DOESN'T WANT A BAG!"
Sick lady: "Yes, I'm sure. It's fine."
Rachel's thoughts: "I told you so!"
Pharmacy lady: "I just want to make sure, because I usually want a sack, to keep my milk from getting all dirty."
Sick lady: "Well, I guess it would help.  It might make it easier to carry."
Pharmacy lady, as she bags the milk: "Well, I wouldn't carry it with the handles.  These bags are kind of weak."
ARRRGGGGG!!!!!!

When it was my turn, Pharmacy lady says, "Monica?"  "No," says I, "I'm her mother."  "Oh!  heh heh I'm sorry.  Do you have any questions for the Pharmacist?" "Nope (just let me the hell out of here, OK?)" OK, "Nope" is the only thing I said out loud, but I thought the other part REAL loudly.

She told me that the copay was $10, and I handed her my flex spending card.  She looked at it and said, "I'm sorry, the name on this card is RACHEL."  "Ummm, yeah, that's me."  "But, this prescription is for Monica," says the idiot/moron/freak-of-nature.  "Yes.  As I told you: I'm her MOTHER," says the stunned/bored/freaked out me.

I barely got out of there without having to take a body count.  People are so stupid.  I typically love people.  Honestly!  I joke about hating people, but I really don't.  It's just that, when I run into stupid people, I can barely stand it.  Seriously.  I wanted to run out of there in tears.

I didn't, though.  I made it out alive. 

Now, I'm going to put on some uncomfortable shoes and eat O'Lean chips on the way to the dentist.  I'll enjoy a warm beer while someone ties my earlobes over my head.  The dentist office will have out-of-control kids running around, I hope.  Maybe the icicle in my eye ball will distract me from the crappy drivers and liars.

It would HAVE to be better than the pharmacy.