How to Deal

I'm trying to learn how to deal.  Nobody my age should have this much stress at work.  There's going to be a "come-to-Jesus" meeting real soon.  I gotta hang on.  I know it'll be better.  It HAS to be better, or I can't do it any more.  It will be better.  It always is.  Just needed to vent, in a vague sort of way.

I'm good at what I do.  I'm a valuable member of a great team.  My potential is barely tapped.  I am strong support to my coworkers, and a crutch to most of my customers.  I'm good at what I do.  Damn good.  You'd be lucky to have me as a CSR.

I'm just sayin'.

today and a tag

Today, I was at work for 12 1/2 hours.  We had to stay from 5-9 for training, but got done early, and I left at 8:20.  Add in the hour commute (each way) and you've got a LONG day.  This was one of those days that made me reconsider my job.  Seriously, I would have walked out and quit today, if it weren't for my responsibilities at home.  When I was younger, I gave a bad situation a day or a week to resolve itself, before walking away.  I'm old.  I'm giving this until the first of the year.  My wheels are turning, and my company and career are worth too much to walk away with considering all possibilities.  Today, though, I'm fed up.  Let me scream, and get over it:  ARRRRRGGGGGGG!

Russ posted this, and I'm going to play, for the sake of an entry.  Never let it be said that I didn't do the least I could do"

1. A month before it happens you're told you're going to lose your memory. How do you prepare for it and do you attempt to regain what you've lost?  Hell, I guess I'd lable everything and tell Kevin to be prepared that my memory was going to be slightly worse than it is now.

2. How do you describe your outlook on life?  Mostly optimistic, with a side of sarcasm.

3. You fall in love with your soulmate, decide to get married, and then find out that person is going to die soon. Do you marry them anyway?  soul mate?  Yes, then take out a huge insurance policy.  A girl's got to live, ya know?

4. What are three of your favorite ice cream toppings? I am lactose intolerant, so don't eat it much, but I like Magic Shell quite a bit.   I also like crumbled chocolate chip cookies if the ice cream is vanilla.

5. Is there one article of clothing you love to wear no matter how out of style it is?  Style?  What's that.  I wear jeans and Tshirts in the summer, sweats and Tshirts to mix it up in the winter.  Plus, my office area is frigid cold, so I usually wear a sweatshirt over whatever I have on.  Currently, I keep the new one that Mom got for me in Colorado.  During the day, the production people probably think I wear the same damn red sweatshirt EVERY day!  LOL

6. Is there one color you wish would go away in fashion?  Fashion?  What's that?  I guess it's not a color as much as a style.  Put some clothes on, skinny hussies!

7. What's the first department you head to when you go shopping in a department store?  Probably whatever I went in for, since I don't shop unless I need something specific.

8. How far away do you live from your parents? Less than 2 miles.

9. Growing up, who was your favorite cartoon character? Tom, from Tom and Jerry.  Poor cat couldn't catch a break, but I DID see him get drunk once.

10. You plan a romantic evening and everything goes wrong, including the fancy dinner you burned. What do you do?  Wake up and go to work.  Romantic evenings in a marriage of 11 years consist of a babysitter and a frozen pizza.

11. What's the last thing you bought at the store? A new lunch box.  Or, if you say it with a BAD southern/hick accent, a "lunch bucket".

12. Have you ever walked out in the middle of a movie? Nah...cost to much to go in the first place.  We average going to a theater once every 2-3 years, so I stay, even if it's bad.

13. What celebrity do most people say you look like?  Maude?  ROFL, I don't know.  I've never had anyone compare me to a movie star. 

14. Is there any piece of jewelry you always wear?  My watch (cheap-o Walmart model, 6 years old, paid less than $10 for it) and my wedding ring.  Earrings make my ears swell and itch, and I can't afford other jewlery.  I'm not like that anyway, see the answer to #5.

15. Have you ever tried to pick someone up?  Yes, and failed.  I'm not usually that brave, but alcohol played a part in the try, and the rejection.

16. What's the one thing you always manage to lose on your way out the door?  I sometimes forget to put on my watch, and wind up looking at my bare wrist all day. 

17. Out of all creatures --  which one are you most afraid of?  Realistically?  Bulls.  I haven't interacted with many species that literally "scare" me, although I avoid some, but a bull is a mean creature, quite often.

18. What's the last gift you bought for a friend?  Hmmm, poor Tammy.  Only one greatest gal pal, and I can't think of a thing.  The gift of my friendship?  Sheesh, I gotta buy something for Tammy.  Maybe mom will give up internet or dish and loan me some gift money.

19. Do you ever buy people things for no reason?  Nah, I don't even buy people things when there IS a reason.  Wait, I take that back...Sometimes I suprise Kevin with donuts or a coke, when he doesn't know I'm stopping at QT.

20. What's your favorite way to spend a lazy summer afternoon?  Either watching Keving grill, sleeping, watching mindless stuff on Discovery channel, or drinking a beer.

Life N Storms N Senior Pics N Stuff

What a weekend!  Saturday, we had Natalie's birthday dinner at Mom's...TatorTot casserole and Oreo Berzert (sorry, family joke.)  It was awesome; I ate too much, and went home miserable (the good, overeating kind of miserable.)  We came home so Kevin could nap (the pain pills knock him out) and I could laze around on the couch.  The puppy was a NIGHTMARE!  She would pee on the floor (linoleum, thank goodness) minutes after being taken outside, bite when you tried to pet her (she's a puppy, you know) and run from us when we tried to catch her.  Sheesh, I said some AWFUL things to that dog.  Things about giving her away, shooting her, and beating her senseless.  I did none of those things, but my mouth, when angry, says ugly things.

Yesterday, the girls went to church, and we (mostly Kevin) did some housework.  I tried to take some pictures of Brett, since I can't afford a photographer right now.  The poses worked OK, but the skin tones were yuck and I blew out the highlights.  Damn.  The dog?  She was an angel!  Coming when we called her, peeing and pooping outside only, and being generally endearing.  Damn dog!  Make a liar out of ME will you!?!?  Just kidding.   I told her she was sweet, and that I wouldn't shoot her.  Maybe we've reached an understanding?  Probably not, just an off day for her, but she was quite sweet.

Then, the storms came.  The news mentioned our little town more than it's been mentioned in the last 100 years.  We were famous!  Famous, and close to death, to hear them tell about it.  We prepared a basket to take downstairs (flashlights, candles, cell phones, sodas, a battery radio, cigarettes and lighter, and the like.  Things we would need if it all went bad, you know?  We made the girls put shoes on, in case of walking over a disaster area) and I called Mom.  She was watching the news, and they were fine, so we stood outside like stupid hicks and watched it coming.  The kids were downstairs and the dogs were NOT leaving a human, no matter what.  The sirens FREAKED Hawkeye out.  We finally joined the kids downstairs for a bit, butmore for them than us.  We could tell it was south of us, and no tornado ever touched down around here.  It DID make for an exciting evening though.

The downfall was missing the first 1/4 of Big Brother.  With the Emmy's being so *incredibly* boring, I needed more than one hour of moronic reality nonsense.  No luck.  We finally went to bed at 9ish, and I soon moved to the couch.  Kevin's health and joint issues (no, he's not a druggie, he just has issues with the joints in his body) was causing RLS (restless leg syndrome) so he jerked about every 45 seconds. I was NOT going to get any sleep in there.  I'm so thankful that our couch is comfortable.

I'm thankful that our home (and that of my parents) is safe.  I'm thankful for a basement.  I'm thankful for a man who works hard through all manner of pain. I'm thankful for my darling children, the youngest of whom will be 9 tomorrow (am I THAT old?) and I'm thankful for my life.  We make it through so much, and never lose sight of what we have.  We have everything. 

Sleep in peace tonight, my friends.  Sleep knowing that somewhere in Missouri, there is someone wishing the best for you.  Someone is pulling for you.  Someone wants you to be as happy as I am.  Someone who wants you to find peace in a storm, peace in your family, and peace in yourself.  I am happy, blessed, and thankful.  I love you, my friends.

Please answer this question

Is there a job you would NEVER do?  I mean, NEVER.  I overheard a conversation at work a while back, this chick said, "I'd never work fast-food again...I've been to college."  WHAT?  I've been to college, too.  I can tell you right now, I'd work at whatever I needed to. 

I've done fast food, I've cleaned bathrooms, I've done data entry, I've done customer service.  I've been a cashier, a receptionist and a day-care teacher.  There is NOTHING I can think of that I'd never do again, if my family was hungry. 

I've seen Dirty Jobs, and I still come up blank.  Is there ANYTHING that you wouldn't do?  Answer here in a comment, or in your jounral (leave a link) so I can tell if I'm weird, or if this was an idiot that I overheard.  Really, she was an idiot, right?

The scoop on Kevin

Kevin had the appointment with the surgeon this morning.  After being sent down for X-rays on his neck (in addition to the MRI results he already had) he was told this:  Basically, it's what he can live with.  Surgery is the ONLY thing that will fix it.  He has bone spurs and scar tissue on two vertebrae, pressing on the spinal chord.  That causes the pain and the numbness.  The surgeon didn't want to rule out shoulder trouble, either, so he ordered another MRI.  Kevin will go back two weeks from today to see what he says.  *sigh*

No 40 year old man should live on pain pills.  He doesn't take them unless it's an alternative to suicide, but he takes them pretty often.  He hurts.  He's a crab-ass when he hurts, so I always know when he needs a pain pill.  He avoids taking them as long as he can.  We can't live like this.  He needs help, whether it's surgery or alternatives.  I intend to spend the next two weeks looking at alternatives.  There is a place in KC called the Headache and Pain Center, and I want to see if they accept insurance.  Plus, you know me, I'll be doing some Internet research.  *sigh*

His area manager gave us some good news today.  He wanted an update from Kevin, and told him that his job was safe, regardless.  He said that we should NOT worry about that, and he would be taken care of.  That is a load off.  His job is "delivery coordinator" and shouldn't be physical, but it is.  He carries 300 lb doors that measure 6'8"x5' 1/2" wide because nobody else there can do it.  It's not right, but it's his job.  *sigh*

Kevin is worried about losing the house.  I believe we won't.  Sure, we don't have savings or any kind of parachute at all, but frankly, we've been through this same situation when I wasn't working, and we made it.  If he has to stay home for a while to heal, we'll drop insurance on everything but the truck, have no child-care cost, and save on half of our gas money.  It can be done.  I will be the strong one, until he can be again.  And, all of this is speculation.  Maybe we'll find a way out of surgery...but bottom line is:  He can NOT live in pain for the rest of his life.  I won't allow it.  *sigh*

A day in the life

A day in the life

This is my first attempt at video, and it's pretty sad.  Mom is putting video up so fast, I had to compete!  This is the first try.  We'll see if it works.  And a few notes:

The girls room isn't that dark, but it doesn't photograph well.

The pup is more vocal than this, but doesn't perform for the camera as she should.

OK, there is more that I could explain, but heck with it.  I have to get up at 4 a.m.  I'm gone.  See ya!

Good supper

Tonight, I am satisfied with our supper.  Usually, it's something quick and painless, or stuff from a box.  Tonight, we had peas, macaroni and cheese, and breaded catfish.  Wow, it was good.  Kevin got a good deal on the catfish, and it was breaded, boneless, and ready to fry.  We all ate too much, with leftovers for lunch tomorrow!  Yum.

Brett's working, Natalie didn't feel good after dinner, so she took a long bath.  School sometimes stresses these girls until they are almost sick.  If I can find a way to relax them, they're fine.  They love school, and seeing their friends, but getting back into the routine of working the brain kind of gets to them.

This pup is making me nuts.  Poor thing had no attention today, with all of us gone, so now she needs lovin'....NOW!  She's boxing at my feet, and barking, until I pick her up.  It's cute.  Kevin does the same thing.  ROFL, just kidding.

I met Kevin at Quik Trip tonight, and traded him vehicles.  He's been driving the ol' reliable van (no air, squeeky springs, etc) and I've been driving the truck (with a good stereo, full a/c, and speed out of this world.)  I tossed him his truck key as we were leaving QT, and let him enjoy his baby for the 20 minute drive home from OG.  It's not much, but I appreciate him.

Well, time to retire for the night, and see what's on TV.  Ya'll have a great night, and I'll "see" ya tomorrow!

Tuesday Stuff

I was so happy to see my brother participate in my tag!  I hope more folks do as they get the chance.  I've seen some funny answers, mostly about the "enemy" part.  I have many more ideas now, if the chance presents itself to exile someone.

For now, Mom's not taking a job, so I still have my sitter.  For the record, though, I am not anti-day care.  I worked day care for 6 years, 2 years of which I was an assistant director.  If it paid more, I'd be doing it still.  I know that many folks (most folks) working day care, love it.  If they don't love it, they won't stay long...it doesn't pay enough.  I just love knowing that my kids are with someone who loves them.  Not just loves kids, but loves THEM for who they are.  She sees their unique personality traits and appreciates their weirdness.  I don't want to trade that away.  If I get rich, I'd pay her triple to do what she does now.

OK, that's all I've got.  The dogs are making noise, one kid is on the computer, one kid is watching cartoons, one kid is causing the dogs to make noise, and the hubby is watching a western in the bedroom.  Time to wrangle all together for Big Brother in 10 minutes.  Have a wonderful night, my peeps.

A bunch of crap...NStuff

Well, employee appreciation day was fun.  We wouldn't have gone, but the girls love it so much.  Kevin's only reservation was the fuel it would take to get us there.  We weren't there long before he won a $20 prize in Bingo, so the fuel was paid.  The girls got to go in a moon bounce thing and make unlimited crafts.  We got a family picture taken for free, and I'll get a package of pictures, plus the image, to order whatever I want.  There was a hula hoop contest (Natalie came in second) and a petting zoo, and good food and fun.  The girls thanked us over and over for going, so I was glad we did.

Brett has a line on a car for sale, cheap.  With our neighbor and friend, JJ, on the case, I hope to get him fixed up soon.  His dad has been most generous, loaning him a car for now, so everyone is getting to work daily.

We got our highest electric bill of the year today.  Over $200 for a month!  SHEESH!  It was about $80 more than a normal summer month.  Yes, it was the hottest month of the year, but we had a long talk with the girls about turning off lights, radios, TVs and such.  Yes Dad, you are getting your revenge for all those years of my curling iron being left on.  Now I'm typing in a room lit by the monitor and a tad bit of evening light that is still left.  LOL  I'm glad I know how to type without looking at the keyboard!  That's why that raised bump is on the F and G keys...to find home row.

Brett grilled for us tonight.  Burgers, hot dogs, and Kevin's smoked sausages.  Now we have a lot of leftovers for lunches and such.  I love grilled dogs.  What a treat!  Plus, I didn't have to cook it.  What a great night for him to be off work.

Mom may get a job.  There is a great day care here in town, but I've been spoiled.  I will be paying more than twice as much, and they won't have people who REALLY love them there.  It will be more structured, which is a plus, but I was loving being out of the day care scene.  There is always something.  Plus, if I'm running late, I call Mom and tell her I'll be 10 minutes late.  Day care usually charges by the minute if you're late.  She said not to worry, it probably won't work out for the job.  I gotta start planning for it, though.  Just in case.

There are going to be some major changes around here.  Back to Aldi for groceries, no more fountain drink stops, no more lottery tickets, and no more nights at Joker's with friends.  It's not the babysitting thing...that hasn't even happened.  It's just that our "outgo" is more than our "income" right now.  I don't want to be filthy rich (OK, I'd like to try it out for a while) but I am sick of being poor.  I want to eat a meal out once a month.  I want to see a movie before it's on cable.  I want, I want, I want.  What a spoiled brat.  We're fine.

I'm not sad or depressed.  I am planning to make some changes at work, to get more of a challenge, and more satisfaction.  I'm an immediate gratification type of person.  I need to help people NOW, not in theory only.  I hope that an improvement in my work life will result in a happier "home Rachel." 

Kevin may need surgery again.  His shoulder has been hurting more and more all the time.  He has cervical spinal stenosis, and went for an MRI last week.  In two years, it's not drastically worse, but it's worse.  The Dr. said that even a small change can mean much worse pain.  He has an appointment with a neurosurgeon on Friday morning.  Temporary disability would create some new financial problems, but would eliminate day care, and half the fuel and insurance cost.  I just hate thinking about someone cutting on him, near the spinal cord.  It didn't bother me to think he'd need surgery on his shoulder again...this has me bothered a bit.  Time will tell.

Well, I guess that's enough rambling for now.  This entry went nowhere, I know.  I just needed to vent to a friend...or two.  I think I'll go open the fridge, to get some light.  ROFL

A tag?

I've done a few tags, but have never started one.  I hope this one catches on.  I just started throwing questions at Kevin, and I liked where the conversation went.  I'll post about employee appreciate day tomorrow....honest!

1. If you could vacation anywhere in the world, where would it be?

2. If you could vacation anywhere in the United States, where would it be?

3. If you could vacation anywhere in your home state, where would it be?

4. If you could live anywhere in the world, where would it be?

5. If you could live anywhere in the United States, where would it be?

6. If you could live anywhere in your home state, where would it be?

7. If you could send your worst enemy anywhere in the world, where would it be?

8. If you could send your worst enemy anywhere in the United States, where would it be?

9. If you could send your worst enemy anywhere in your home state, where would it be?

Now, for my answers:

1. The carribian, or Cancun, or some beachy, oceany, tropical place.  I like the idea of umbrella drinks and cabana boys, ok?

2. South Carolina.  I wish I had more time when I went to Myrtle Beach for work.  What a cool vacation spot.

3. The Ozarks.  Yeah, I've lived there and vacationed there and visted there, but I love it.

4. Missouri.  I would love to see a lot of places, but I can't imagine living anywhere else.

5. Missouri.  Ditto.

6. Right here in Missouri, baby.  This littletown has little to offer, unless you are a small town, hick girl like me.  I am quite content here.

7. Antartica.  Freeze to death, jerk.

8. Alaska.  Freeze to death, jerk.

9. Right here, next door to me.  Keep your enemies closer and all that jazz.  I'd let my dog poop in your yard, and play loud music at all hours, and mow my lawn in a skimpy bathing suit, fat and all.

:edited to add the "tags"...this is my first time, remember!?

I tag Russ, and Mom, and Amy, and Celeste, and Anne, and...oh heck, I'm blanking out.  Jim?  Feel game?  Anyone else who sees it, please play along and comment here (including a link) so I'll check out your answers.

Just listen....

Here's the deal:  I've heard a lot today, and it amuses me.  My family is cool, funny, and insightful.  I will assign a color to each member, to keep it straight. Monica is pink, Natalie is red, Kevin is green, and Brett is blue.  My thoughts and comments will be in black.  Here goes:

Nothing is fun anymore!  Yes, dear.  I won't let you play in the van, and that sucks.  It's an automobile, not a playground. (Her dad let them play in it several hours later.  I bit my tongue.)

Dad?  DAD!?  Hey Mom, where's Dad?  This was spoken after he'd been gone for over three hours, to the store and other errands.  When I told her where he was, she said, "Oh yeah, I forgot." 

I have to find a cheap car.  This was spoken after finding out that fixing the truck is a pipe dream.  We have to find a VERY inexpensive car that gets decent mileage.  Hell, if I knew how to do that, the van would be GONE.

I have to remove myself from the public, before I kill somebody. This was spoken after he spent some quality time in WalMart and in traffic.  He was almost in the fetal position in the corner, sucking his thumb....but not quite.

Can Lucy be my dog?  This came after Lucy pottied outside for Natalie.

She BIT MY EAR!  This came 10 minutes after the above quote.

Mom!  I love this chat room!  This came from Monica, after finding a kid-friendly chat on AOL.  Yes, I watched closely and monitored and was skeptical, but it has a host to keep things on the up-and-up, and it was all innocent fun, so we'll see what happens.

But I'm not tired!  This was spoken while yawning, and she soon fell asleep.  Tomorrow is a kid day, so they need their rest.

I am SICK of this!  There is NO reason for people to make a mess like this!  NOBODY better mess up this bathroom when I'm done...NOBODY!  This was overheard while Monica was cleaning the bathroom. Both girls chose a room to clean, and it was her choice, but DAMN they sound like me when they clean.

Well, it's been a typical Saturday around here, and tomorrow is a kid-friendly day.  My job is hosting "employee appreciation day" in KC, and I hope to get to Burr Oak Woods in time for the activities that are planned for 8-11 year old kids before we head there, since both girls fall into that age group.

My family is awesome.

First Day 'N Stuff

I took the girls to school today, for their first day.  They were excited when they left, and happy when they got home.  A good start, I'd say!  Now, on to my homework of signing 492 papers by tomorrow.

I had planned to post these two pictures, but found something on my camera.  A whole series of 9 shots that I did NOT take!  See what happens if you leave your camera in plain sight at a place full of photographers?  Sheesh, some people do NOT have enough work to do.

I don't know why I included them except to taunt the person who took them.  I KNOW he'll see this, eventually.  BWAAHAAHAAAHAAAAAA!

Here we are.

Well, school starts tomorrow.  As per tradition, I'll drop the girls off for their first day.  Tomorrow night, all three kids will bring home loads of homework for me.  Health forms, lunch money forms, field trip permission slips, contact update forms, and something begging for money, I'm sure.  They never have homework on the first day, I always do.  *sigh*  It'll have to be done after Big Brother is over.  That's all I've got to say 'bout that.

Brett called in sick tonight.  I started to blow, since he has a friend over for the night, went to Oak Grove to visit old friends, and seemed fine last night.  I started to, then I quit.  In two months, he'll be an "adult."  I can control when he goes to school, what he does in this house, and where he goes.  I cannot control how he treats his job.  That's between him and his employer.  He even talked to me like an adult and said, "I don't know why you don't believe me that I got sick.  I've been doing so good lately."  Point taken.  He really has.  Anyway, it's not for me to decide.  It's his deal.

Natalie had another bout of lice while she was at Grammy's.  She attended camp there, so who knows?  Anyway, Grammy did an alternative treatment, suggested by her neice (a hairdresser.)  It got rid of them, but didn't kill the eggs.  That made my mission clear.  Do all treatments, back to back, to ensure they're gone before school starts.  We did Rid, and it appears they're gone.  That's not good enough for me, though.  I'm an extremist.  The next day, I filled her hair with Vaseline.  I knew (from reading) that it would be hard to get out, but I decided to deal with it.

I left it on for 6 hours, then had her wash her hair twice.  Couldn't even tell it'd been washed.  So greasy.  Then, we used Simple Green on it.  It's a great cleaner/degreaser, and totally organic.  It helped some, but not enough.  She went to Mom's with greasy hair.  Monday night, we washed it two more times.  Still greasy.  Tuesday night, we washed it, let it dry, then filled it with baby powder.  Now, we were getting somehwere.  It helped a LOT.  The suggestion was corn starch, but I didn't have any.

Tonight, we used corn starch (thanks to a trip to Wally World on the way home) and she's in the shower again.  School starts tomorrow, and I hope to have her looking minimally greasy.  I'll have her say she used too much Mousse or something.  Whatever.  I don't want lice in the house.  Everyone else is clear.  Why does her baby-fine hair seem so appealing to them, while the rest of us (with thicker hair) stay clear?  Who knows, but I'm prepared with at least two more non-traditional treatments (non-chemical) which will both be used before the weekend is over.

The puppy is doing well.  She'll play and bark and run around for an hour or so in the evening, then put herself to bed.  It's so cute.  She just goes to sleep in the kennel with the door standing wide open.  She looks up as someone passes by, as if to say "HEY!  Turn off the lights, will ya?"

What a messed up household.  What an unconventional mess of a family.  Such a weird group we are.  I wouldn't trade it for anything.

Grrrr, School Supplies

Gotta have #2 pencils?  No problem.  Those are standard.

Gotta have tissue for classroom use?  Fine, even though my kids will hit allergy season using cheap/sandpaper tissues while other cheap kids bask in the joy of Puff Plus® (with lotion!).

Need dry erase markers because the nations budget is being spent on a devastating war?  Fine, I'll get them. (those suckers are pricey!)

Need a certain number of crayons in a box?  OK, but I don't get it.  If more is better, I could get the huge-ass box with a sharpener all day long, but the 24 count box is a bit tough to find this time of year.

Need an eraser?  OK, understandable.  But, why does it have to be white?  I mean, she's going to be in third grade, and will probably make a few mistakes.  Does white erase better than pink?  Or are you a racist?  Hmmmm???? ARE YOU?

Listen.  I've been to two WalMart stores, an Osco, and a Dollar General.  If my kids are short a white eraser or have the wrong type of dry erase marker or the folders with pockets have those pesky, unneeded brads in them...SUCK.IT.UP.  I've done my best.  I've spent over $60 on this meaningless exercise, and I feel like I lost the battle somehow.

Damn public school system.  Can I get a second mortgage for supplies that can't be found in Missouri?  I'd look harder if I had the disposable cash and the time.  I have neither.  Deal with what you've got, Ms. teacher lady.

PHEW!

I officially declare this house to be CLEAN!  All that scrubbing takes it out of a person.  The only thing upstairs that I didn't tackle is our bedroom.  I may do that later, but then again....

Now to start dinner, and get everything cleaned up before Big Brother comes on.  Brett is home from work, Kevin is up from his nap, and the girls have worn their new school shoes around the house for a couple of hours.  You wouldn't believe how many times they've decided shoes fit great, just to get them dirty outside and come in complaining of sore feet.  This time, I'm making them log at least 4 hours of in-the-house wear before we discard the boxes and receipt. 

I hope you all had a relaxing weekend, or at least feel like it was worthwhile.  I did some worthwhile stuff and a lot of relaxing, so I feel like I won!  Back to the grind tomorrow, but I'm so thankful to have a job, when so many folks can't find one.

Sunday N Stuff

Well, here we are.  The girls are home and things are going to get back to normal.  Well, as normal as can be, considering we're talking about MY family.

Brett's Dad came to look at his truck today.  It was Brett's fault.  There was hardly any oil in it at all.  He'd been checking the transmission fluid, but forgetting the oil.  His dad handled it quite well, actually.  He's letting Brett borrow a car to get to and from work and school only, and has a motor that might be usable.  He has to get something fixed on it, but if it can be fixed, it'll be a heck of a lot cheaper than a new motor.

Kevin took the girls to the store for school supplies, and I'm cleaning.  Actually, right this moment, I'm taking a break, but at least the bathroom is scrubbed clean.  This computer room is next.  Sheesh, there is more dust and dog hair in this room that I can believe.  The thing about dust and dog hair: It comes back faster than you can clean it up.  It's everywhere!

Tuesday night, we will meet the girls' teachers, and Thursday morning they start school.  Summer sure flew by.  They start earlier every year, too.  What's up with that?  My child-care cost will be cut in half, but school lunches and everything the school is constantly wanting money for will make up the difference.  What ever happened to a free education?

Well, this room isn't going to clean itself.  Break time's over.  This is me, getting up.  Yup, I feel it coming on.  I'm going to be cleaning in no time.

Yup. 

It's a beautiful day!

No more whining from me this weekend.  We've been through bigger messes than this, and we'll be fine.

It's Saturday.  I don't have to go to work.  It's not 100 degrees.  The girls come home today.  I got to sleep in.  My dog loves me.  My family is healthy.

Yup, there's plenty to be happy with.  My problems haven't gone away, but they are NOT going to control my weekend.  I'm going to kick back and take part in our family tradition.  Imitating the sloth.

Don't read this

The title of the entry should have been enough.  If you're still reading, you didn't get it. STOP READING!  This is a sad and depressing entry.

OK, fine.  You want to hear me cry, keep on reading.  It's your choice. 

This week has been AWFUL at work.  If it weren't for a couple of wonderful people filling in, I'd be about 3-4 days behind.  As it is, I'm only one day behind.  I hate leaving work when I'm not done. *sigh*  We had three people gone on vacation, and one having surgery, and two that have to attend a "new products" meeting each day.  That makes for some lean time on the phones.  I take all the calls I can, but can't get to my out-bound calls.  It sucks, and there's no relief in sight.  I love my job, and I hate my job.  DAMMIT!

After work today, I went to a coworkers house.  I've not seen their (awesome) house yet, since it was built over two years ago.  It is pretty and awesome and serene.  About 10 minutes into my visit, I got a call from Brett.  His truck broke down.  He couldn't get Kevin on the home phone.  I tried a few times and finally got him.  Plans were made for a wonderful neighbor to help them trailer the truck home. *sigh*

I got home shortly before they did.  The engine is blown. Nothing Brett did (thank GOD) but it's gonna be quite pricey to fix it.  More than Brett has.  More than we have.  More than I know how to deal with.

I know his Dad is gonna yell at him.  We have a plan to stop that.  The neighbor that helped is a good friend of Brett's dad.  He'll tell him that it was NOT Bub's fault. Just one of those things that come with driving an old vehicle.  How to get it fixed is a mystery right now.  I just don't have the fundage to do this.  I need to get so much done, to vehicles, that I just did NOT expect to need to help Brett.

The LeBaron is parked, due to needing a timing chain.  Something that takes  money, as well as a place to raise it up high enough to work on it.  The van needs a whole new exhaust.  Brett's truck just blew an engine.  We have four vehicles here, and only Kevin's truck is doing what it should.  Three adults, working three jobs, and one reliable vehicle.  *sigh*.

I know there isn't a debtors prison, but maybe that would be a relief.  I just have to suck it up, eat more generic peanut butter (sorry, Russ) and figure out how to fix 2 or 3 cars.  No problem, right?  Wrong.  I think I'll drink a beer.

Good Night all.  May your cars get you safely from point A to point B.  Ours aren't doing that.

Just NStuff

I don't have much to say, but thought I should say something.

The girls got home Saturday, and left on Wednesday morning.  They went to the state fair with Mom.  They always have a good time, but it's so hot, and Natalie was torn about leaving so soon after getting home.  I'm sure they'd call if I needed to go get her, but I worry.  Mom thinks she's playing us, but I know Natalie.  Those weren't fake tears.  Mom is cynical.  She doesn't know Natalie like we do.  I know when it's a show.  This wasn't a show.

Lucy is doing good.  She's quite an incredible dog.  She's smart and a very quick learner.  There was one day that we had NOBODY to let her out all day.  I felt bad and thought the computer room (the only large-enough room with no carpet) would be a mess.  She peed twice (near an exit) and ran straight out to poo when Kevin took her out.  She understands, we just have to let her bladder control get stronger.

Speaking of caring for other folks pets, I'll pick up Mom's dog on Saturday.  They needed someone to get her from the kennel before noon.  I was happy to oblige.  In fact, I offered to get her on Friday and let her spend the night.  Mom declined.

We're very short-handed at work.  I am working 10-11 hours a day, and barely keeping my head above water.  Salary pay sucks when you put in this many hours.  The problem is: School starts next Thursday.  I can't go in that early any more.  Well, I could, but I will *not* force my girls out of bed at 5 in the morning, just because my employer left us short-handed.  I'll get there an hour early and do what I can.

I sent an email to everyone in my address book, explaining how to forward a message, joke, or alert without sending all of the attachments and addresses of everyone who has seen it.  I made a major faux pas....I won't point it out here, but if you got it, and noticed...I'm sorry.  I know better.  If your address gets to someone who abuses it, let me know.  I'll thrash them

I love you all, and I thank you for giving me this outlet.  It feels good to talk openly without worrying about what someone will think of me. I don't have many readers, but the ones I have mean the world to me.

Happy Birthday Kevin

Kevin's Mom and sister, Susan, came up to bring the girls home yesterday.  Susan's son, Steven was with them.  We tried to stay in and stay cool as much as possible.  I made a carrot cake (by request) and Linda bought a triple chocolate cake. 

I'll try to quit boring you with pup pictures now.  She had her first shots yesterday, and we found out that she weighs 3 lbs, 7.5 oz.  Wow, what a massive animal!

Grammy, Susan and Steven left this morning, before 8.  Linda doesn't have a/c in her car, so they wanted to get out early.  I've spent the past 5 hours cleaning the house.  I spent over 3 hours on my postage stamp sized kitchen!  It's been too long since I deep cleaned.  Although it's still his birthday, Kevin put down my bathroom floor today!  YEAH!  I love it!  I'm so happy to have that done.

Today, Mom's fixing Kevin's birthday dinner, but they're bringing everything over here to eat, since we have a/c.  It's going to be over 100 again today, and besides that, we have a puppy to care for, so it works.

It's great to have the girls home.  They have even gotten into a fight already.  Life is back to normal.

Lots of NStuff, and one more question

Well, the girls come home in the morning.  WoooHooo!  This has been a LONG 4 weeks.  They're happy to be coming home, I'm happy they'll be here.  They are excited about seeing the puppy, but I think they'll be happy to see me, too.

Today is Kevin's birthday.  He is 40 (muffled giggle).  If you've read here for very long, you know that adults get 3-day birthdays around here.  They have to be consecutive, and one must be your actual date of birth.  Kevin chose today thru Sunday.  So far, it's going all right for him.

He got off work at noon.  His boss may have a heart after all.  Plus, with Brett working a rare day shift, it got him home to let the puppy out.  He even did some laundry and cleaning when he got here.  What a doll!  The rule is, you don't have to do ANYTHING you don't want to during your 3-day birthday.

When I got off work, I went to the store.  I bought every snack food that I could think of on his favorites list.  I got a 6-pack of Molsen Canadian beer (he rarely drinks a beer, but this is one of his favorites.  The lables crack me up, so I like when he gets it.)  I also brought home Fiddle Faddle, deluxe mixed nuts (the kind without peanuts), chips and salsa, Double Stuff Oreos, fake crab dip (he may be addicted...intervention?), Hershey's miniatures, and his all time favorite snack food.  Recipe to follow:

Take one Ritz cracker, place a piece of cheddar or pepperjack cheese on it.  Add one ring of jalapeno, and top with 3 drops of Tiger Sauce.  I'm tellin' you, folks, this is wonderful stuff, here.  Sometimes he starts with a slice of summer sausage, but I couldn't find any that looked good.

I also got him a DVD set, with Young Guns and First Blood.  He's wanted to find the original First Blood, and it's tough to find, and I got the combo for less than $9!  To top it off, he found Slingblade on one of the movie channels.  This man is feeling pure bliss, I tell ya!  Two more days to go!

Now, for another "ask anything" question, from Amy:

~What's your favorite food? Hard to say.  I eat anything and love most of it.  Probably Pizza, followed closely by Pringles.  Or anything from Red Lobster, or Olive Garden.  Oh wait!  I forgot about burgers!  ahhh, never mind.
~You go to get a snow cone.  What flavor do you get? Probably rainbow, because they're pretty.  My teeth are in pretty bad shape, so I don't get them, really, but I like them.  They're food, right?  Yeah, I like them a lot.
~What state do you really not want to visit? I'd like to visit every state, honestly.  I'm not that well travelled, so I'm curious.  I'd say that, if I had to choose one to stay out of, it'd be Idaho.  Why?  Because I don't know anyone from there, or anything about it.

OK, See ya'll later!

Answers

Well, here are the questions, and the answers.  Nothing Mom doesn't know, yet.  She knows most, since I'm pretty open now, about my past.  So far, though, there's nothing she didn't find out on her own...the hard way:

1. From Kevin: With the gift of perfect hindsight, would you marry me all over again?  Yes, Babe.  I love you more every day.  You are what men are supposed to be.  You take care of the family and consider us first, before yourself.  I'm not worthy.

2. From Russ: I'm asking this first one just to get you in trouble with your ma: 

"What age were you when a guy first got his hand under your bra?" I was 16.  Yeah, I made a lot of mistakes, but I made it longer than most kids do now!

"What would you do to Kevin if you found out he was cheating on you?"  (Of course he never would, but I like asking the tough hypotheticals) I would kick his ass to the curb.  I would expect no less from him, if the roles were reversed.  I don't care when, why, or how.  He's gone.

"What is your biggest regret?" The time I spent with H.  He was an abuser and a cheater and a liar, and I bought into his lies over and over. I believed I could never be anything without him.  He was wrong.  Baby, look at me now! (big loser jerk)

"When is the last time you cried -- and why?" Today, at work.  We are so short handed this week (and next) that I am working 10-11 hours a day, and can't keep up.  Nobody would fault me for it, but I pride myself on "takin' care of business" and I'm failing.  I am mad at me, and it's out of my control.  I cried 3 times today, dammit.  Thanks for rubbing salt in THAT paper cut, dude.

"What's the minimum amount of money you'd need to appear naked at the Missour state fair for five minutes?" My gut answer was "HELL NO!  No amount of money would make me do that!  Then, I thought, Heck, we need cash, I'd do it for a grand.  Then, I thought, "The kids need school shoes, and I'm old and tired.  I'd do it for $100."  ROFL

 

3. From am4039: Ok here is one. Growing up what kind of a child were you? I guess I could ask your mom. LOL.  Good, bad into everything. As a teenager also. I know I was a wild teenager. I feel so bad for my mom. As a kid, I was a tomboy.  I wanted to ride bikes, spit, pee outside and cuss right along with the neighbor boys.  As a teen, I was a bitch.  I lied, snuck around, and did things that made Mom stay up at night wondering.  I hate that I did it, and I wish I could take it back.  Yeah, I have two girls.  They'll be teens at the same time.  Karma sucks. 

So, that's my answers to the questions posed.  So far, no sweat.  Let's leave it at that, shall we? LOL  No, really, I don't care.  Ask away.

Anything? Are you SERIOUS?

Well, against my better judgment, I'm gonna take the plunge here.  Many are doing "ask my anything" entries, and I think it's a good idea...for YOU!  I'm a bit concerned, but I'm going to do it.  I think of myself as an open book, but I can't help but wonder if there is something I won't answer, considering the fact that my Mom reads this journal.  Hmmmm.  OK, here goes.  I mean, I *think* she knows everything by now.  Wow, I hope so.  Quit thinking and hit "save", Rachel:

You may ask me anything via email or comment.  I will try my best to answer anything, but if I'm uncomfortable posting it here, I may email you the answer...but only as a last resort.

Go ahead, ask!

Buried in snow, and freezing

Yeah, I know, there's no snow, and nobody's cold around here, but I didn't want to start a post griping about the 100+ temps.  Most of the country is in the same boat...no paddles to be found.

Mrs. Poopins cleaned the house, organized my spice rack (yeah right, like I have one of those) and has since moved on to visit Georgia, by request.  Hope she does a good job there.

This morning, after my commute, I started hearing reports.  Some guy was walking down I-70, removing clothing, and flipping people off.  He was walking in and out of traffic, and causing such a commotion.  I MISS ALL THE GOOD STUFF!!!!!  I'm looking online at all the local news station's websites, and can find NOTHING!  Apparently, a citizen took him down before the cops could get there.  Damn, I'd love to read or hear the whole story.  Maybe something will be posted tomorrow?  I doubt it.  It's not political or heat related or racial.  Nobody got killed or maimed or kidnapped.  Let's face it:  It was just another Meth Head from good ol' Jackson county.  Hardly news worthy.

Well, time to slip into some fat clothes, eat something bad for me, open a beer, and watch Big Brother.  I won't even START to mention that it's the 1st of the month, and I started work at 5:55 to run monthly statements.  grrrrr, I'm such a crab-ass on statement day.  One of the girls who reports to me ( a receptionist) brought me lunch from Church's, though.  That was nice.  Beat the hell out of the 98 cent frozen dinner I took in with me today.

All in all, not a bad day after all.  Oh, and even better....3 full days until the girls come home!