Check this out, OK?

OK, here's the deal:

go to tiny little division, OK?

You don't understand.  Most of you already love Toonguy (Russ to some of us) and you think he's funny.  there is a site for the cartoonists to let go of some creativity.  These are things that are NOT approved for cards that you'll buy in the stores.  Some are weird, some are crazy, and ALL are things that you will NOT find while browsing the card isle at WalMart.

Because many of my coworkers check this site daily, I was shocked with Russ said that it "wasn't catching on."  Hell, we FREAK if we can't access this site.

I'm not kidding.  Go.  Go read it, and let me know what you think, OK?

Promise?

91 is hot!

UNCLE!

I CRY UNCLE!

OK, 91 is HOT!  Actually, I could probably still deal with it.  I get home at 6, and by 9 it is OK in here.  The problem is that the girls will spend some time here during the day, so we can't have it this hot.

I got home tonight and let Hawkeye out, and later asked him if he'd like to come back into the house.  He turned around slowly, lifted his right paw, flipped me off and said, "Screw you, woman!"  OK, dude.  I know it's hot in here.  No need to be rude!

My a/c quit, my garbage disposal quit, my hot water heater is leaking (but still working) and on Sunday, my dryer quit.  I was ready to throw in the towel and go back to renting, until neighbor Jimmy (bless his soul) told us that he had a dryer down there, doing nothing.  Well, let's put it to work, my friend!

The garbage disposal has been replaced with a straight pipe (we have a dog, after all) and the dryer situation is handled for now.  The a/c guy will be called tomorrow, and the hot water heater can leak until it quits, or until I have $500 extra lying around.  Anyone want to gift $500 to me?  No?  I thought not.  I can handle the slow stream in the basement.

The girls come home on Saturday, and I can't WAIT!  I called them twice, and sent texts twice tonight.  I try not to contact them more than 4 times per week, so that they don't get sad, missing home too much.  Now, we're 2 1/2 days out, so I can call all I want.  They're stoked!  We'll go firework shopping next week.

Oh, and JIM IS COMING THIS WEEKEND!  HE'S BRINGING MY GEORGIA PEACH OF A NIECE WITH HIM!  Yeah, you guessed it.  I'm excited.  We'll have so much fun.  On the 4th, we'll have many folks around, and Kevin will grill, wearing his new apron that Mom bought for him in Branson.

Yeah, Dad, Mom got the credit.  Sad, huh?  Kevin lives that crap, so talk to him.

Anyway, we've got appliance troubles, but much to be thankful for.  I choose to focus on the good stuff.  I'll see Jim and Lyndsay in a few days.  It's about time!

Oh, and one more thing...for Russ.  There was an awesome cartoon on www.tinylittledivision.com today.  It wasn't up for long.  Was it pulled for the questionable content?  Is there any way I could get it emailed to me?  4 of us at work saw it before it was pulled.  We NEED this cartoon.  It's like a drug, man!

Peace out, suckers!

Natalie's letter

I got a letter from Natalie today.  Actually, Kevin and I both got letters.  He's asleep, so I don't have permission to publish his letter, but I'll share mine.  I will type it exactly as she wrote it.  Her grammer, spelling, and punctuation is 100% better than only a year ago.  I'm proud of that.

Some things that you need to know before you read this are: I told her the a/c broke, and told her that I hoped I didn't get a heat rash on my butt.  I started with "Dear Pumpkin Butt" and ended with "Love, Mommalicious"  I told her that the trip to the KS party was long, but we made the best of it by joking around.  Also, Kevin usually gets a good deal on fireworks due to the tent in the parking lot of his employer.  I think that covers everything.  If anything is not clear, let me know.  By now, you know that we have a weird sense of humor around here.  Deal with it.  The sooner you deal with it, the better off we'll all be.

And now, the letter:

Dear Momilicious,

Hey Mom!! Down here it's good.  I sure do miss you, too!  I'm glad your friends, you, and dad had a good time on your drive.  And you're right, you do have to make the best of a bad situation.

I am looking foward to my week at camp.  Thanks for sending a care package.  I got Dad's letter with yours, too.

No I can't believe it's 2 1/2 weeks 'til the 4th of July.  I can't wait either.  I hope Daddy gets fireworks, too.  I can't wait to see Lindsey and uncle Jim.

I can't believe the air conditioner broke!  I'm glad we have fans.  Oh, and if you do get a butt heat rash, I would see a doctor about that. LOL!!!

I love you, too and can't wait to get HOME!!!

Love you,

Pumpkin Butt

(LOL)

P.S. (xxxxxxxxxxxx) is a my coke rewards code.)

That's the letter.  It was so great, it made me cry.  There were a couple of grammatical errors, but other than one misspelled word, it was awesomely done, and melted this momma's heart.  I can't wait until they get home on Saturday!

Oh, and you didn't think I'd give out my coke code, did you?  LOL

Random thoughts that do NOT go together

These thoughts do not go together in any fashion.  They are just things that have crossed my mind today.  In no particular order:

I saw a semi trailer that said "fresh young chicks" following a semi trailer that said "hot and fresh."  Hmmm.  Slut trucks.

My man-child Brett started work today, at his new job...working for Kevin.  We'll see how that goes, but today was good for both of them, so I'm hoping and praying.  Kevin needs yard help at the lumber yard; Brett needs a job.

My brother is coming for a visit.  He's bringing my Georgia peach niece with him.  I cannot wait!

Kevin has 33 hours in at work this week.  It's TUESDAY!  Yes, he's in bed.  At 6:30.  His body can't take this, so I worry.

There was some awesome lightning this morning, on my way in to work.  I love a good storm.

My deck is too hot tonight, even in the shade of my fabulous umbrella.  Maybe later.

The girls are coming home on Saturday.  I could pee myself with excitement.  I got the greatest letter from Natalie today, and a call from Monica last night.  It's TIME!

I asked Kevin if he needed a treat tonight.  He did.  I didn't know what to get, but as I exited in OG, I saw a sign for Dairy Queen.  Kevin LOVES (and would marry) the Peanut Buster Parfait.  I got one, wrapped it in napkins, shoved it in a bag, and got home as fast as I could.  He was SO happy.  I'm a good wife.

I helped coworker "T" with our software today.  How can he work in sales for our lab, and not even know the software? Good lord.  He didn't know what a browser window was, or a scroll bar, or where to find images on his computer.  *sigh*  Why me?

OK,I should stop.  I have had a TON of rambling thoughts today, and it would take all night.  You don't have that kind of time.  Actually, if you made it this far, I think you may need a hobby.

Peace out!

My bottom smells bad

OK, folks, my bottom smells bad.

My car has no a/c and it got kind of hot today.  What?  Did you think I meant THAT?  You're nasty.

On my way home, I turn right about 5 miles from my home.  Three of those miles are through the river bottoms.  When it's hot, the temperature drops 10 degrees (at least) as I make this corner.  I cruise through the river bottoms, enjoying the cooler temps. 

In fact, if I stick my arm out the window JUST right, and lean forward, the cool air goes up my sleeve and around my back, sending chills up my spine as the sweat dries.  It is my FAVORITE part of the commute home.

HOWEVER.  However, this area has flooded recently.  It's flooded more than once.  Now, there is stagnant water standing there, and it smells.  Saying it smells is an understatement.  Have you ever smelled a shallow, stagnant pond?  Yeah, take that times 10.  It's bad.

So, tonight, I round the corner, feel the temperature drop, stick my arm out the window JUST right, and took a deep breath through my nose.

AARRRRRGGGGGG!!!!!!

I gagged a bit, curled my nose, and decided that I would deal with it.  Honestly, the smell is worth it.  Ever had cool air hit your arm pit during a hot day?  No?  Then you're a liar.  I know you've stepped in front of a fan, raising your shirt or positioning your clothing in a way that achieves maximum cooling.

I got home to a house that isn't half bad, even with a broken a/c unit.  Two fans makes it quite comfortable, and my electric meter thanks me.  Hell, if I knew it would never get over 90, I wouldn't even get it fixed for a while.  It WILL get over 90, though, so I guess we better have it looked at.

The next time someone tells you that their bottom stinks, wait for the whole story, OK?  Yeah, I know, nobody will EVER say those words to you again.  I'm OK with that.

Almost a week's worth of entries

I know, I know.  I haven't posted since Wednesday, but there has been SO much going on!  I guess you can tell that by the fact that there are 38 pictures up there.  Here is a rundown:

Thursday, I stopped by my best friend's house to say 'howdy'.  Kevin joined us, and we relaxed on their deck, watching the storms to the North.  What?  To the North?  "Umm, Kevin?  You know that's our house, right?"  He agreed, so I headed out.  As I left, the weirdest clouds ever formed over me.

Within 5 miles, it started to POUR.  I quit taking pictures and started watching the road.  3 miles after that, I could NOT see the road, and went around 10 mph in order to BARELY see the yellow line.  Soon, I was driving through rising flood waters (don't worry, nothing deeper than I could handle, but 10 minutes later and I would have been in trouble.)  My windshield started to fog up, so I rolled the window down about 2". 30 seconds later, the hail started, and it was pinging off my temple.  Awesome, no?  LOL

I got home safely to see that one trash can was halfway down the street, and the other was in the neighbor's yard. *sigh*  I ran to retrieve them, in the pouring rain, and came into the house DRENCHED!  All I could think of was drying off, when I saw it.  Yeah, the a/c is down, so ALL of my windows are open.

OK, time to mop up water.  That took a while, and when I was done, the storm had passed.  Mom says that we got 4" of rain.  I know for a fact that most of it was in less than 2 hours.  Nice.  I got up Friday, and it was all suddenly very funny.

Friday night, coworker Mike came over to attend our town fair, as did my BFF Tammy and her husband Greg.  We ate some BBQ, then went to the fair.  It was smaller than ever, but we hung out for a while, and we got to see Tammy win a 3-legged hippo.  It wasn't "missing" a leg, it was sewn together with only 3.  ROFL

Saturday, Kevin had to work.  He expected to be off work by noon, and we were to attend a 3:00 wedding about an hour from here.  By 1, I knew he'd never be here in time.  Besides that, he hurt REAL bad from the 65 hour week, so I let him off the hook, and told him I was going without him.

I hate weddings, but this one was awesome.  It was in the woods, on their raw land.  They've worked hard to clear it and make it ready, and it was so sweet.  I had a good time, and even had an organic beer.  That was a first, but that's Melodie.  She is a hippy, born too late.  I love her, and everything is natural and organic.  The snake was an odd addition, but I hear that native American's call that a sign of a new beginning.  OK.

Today, we kidnapped Dad, along with Mom and Aunt Rena, and took them to get lunch at the closest Chinese buffet.  It was great, and I had a good time.  Several of you thought that "I missed father's day" or "I missed Dad's birthday" meant that I forgot about them.  That's not the case.  Time just didn't allow any fun until today.

We had a great time, then we came home.  Kevin mowed the lawn and even did the hill with the weed eater (that's a JOB.)  Then, he went down to help neighbor Jimmy with some odd jobs.  I'm watching the end of the Nascar race.  Carl isn't going to win it, but at least he won the Nationwide race yesterday.

OK, I'm done with this marathon entry.  I'll be better at posting, now that things have calmed down.  Have they? Well, maybe for now, but the girls come home next weekend, so it'll get exciting really fast!  LOL

Peace Out!

Happy ____ Day!

I know that I owe some stories from the party, and those will come.  Today, however, I have some dues to pay.  This whole party thing caused us to miss some big days.  Now, I'll try to make it up, although a journal entry doesn't seem like enough.  It's all I've got, though, so here goes:

Mom and Dad's anniversary:  I am one of the VERY few people who have parents that are still married to each other.  Have they ever disagreed?  Yeah.  That's not the point.  They find a way to work it out.  They deal with it.  They get over it.  After so many years together, Congratulations, Mom and Dad!

Dad's birthday:  Happy Birthday, Dad.  It wasn't that long ago that we thought you'd never SEE another birthday.  Now look at you!  You're in better shape than you were before, and you're still doing SO much around there.  Most guys your age are retired and sit around being tired.  I am proud of you, and I brag about you constantly.

Father's day:  The girls weren't with Kevin, and my brother and I were not with my Dad.  What a weird Father's day.  I didn't have a signal (middle of nowhere, KS) when it would have been best, then we got home so late that I thought I'd wake mom.  Dad?  I'm sorry.  I feel REAL guilt about this.  I can't get away at work long enough to call, and now it's been 4 days.  I'll see you this weekend, OK?

Me and Kevin's anniversary:  Honey?  We've made it 13 years.  Can you believe it?  I know we went to dinner the other night, but it seems that you got cheated.  We both worked SO hard that day, and had rough days, so we ate, came home, and I promptly fell asleep, still recovering from the party.  Thank you for driving across the country to take me to a Nascar race.  Thank you for driving me (and our friends) across Kansas to attend a party.  Yeah, you know those folks, too, but you're a home-body.  I doubt you'd have gone if I hadn't wanted it so badly.  You really try to give me more than I could ever hope for, regardless of how little we can afford.  I love you, and I am thankful for you.

Now, let's cut the crap.  Nobody could live with me, and nobody could live with Kevin.  We're a match, and we'd better just protect the public from the likes of us.  LOL

This ends this public service announcement.  It's not enough, but I'll try to make it up to you all.  I promise!